2 Surprising Things I Learned About Myself During My First Performance Review Since Changing Careers

2 Surprising Things I Learned About Myself During My First Performance Review Since Changing Careers Performance review season is a time to reflect. A chance to level up, buckle down and in some cases, back out.This was the case for both wertzuwachs reviews Ive ever had my first, a few years ago, when I was an elementary school teacher and my most recent, now that Im a writer and editor.But this wertzuwachs review was a little different because it came with an unexpected discovery two, in fact.I didnt just circle numbers, drop a few comments and create a plan of attack for the next six months. This review forced me to step out of myself for a second and truly look in the mirror at who I was in my first full-time role since changing careers.And with that, came the following reflections1. I had imposter syndrome.When word of this psychological pattern started going around a few years ago, I had no idea what it meant. It wasnt until my performance review that I was able to recognize it in myself imposter syndrome, a feeling of inadequacy in ones own accomplishments and abilities. Imposter syndrome can look like negative self-talk, lack of self-confidence or the inability to move past your own mistakes (among many other things). On a scale of Im not good at what I do to someone else could do my job better than me, I fell heavily on the latter. And my reasons for why were simple I was a recent career changer and was new to the editorial industry.I spent the first few months taking notes and listening intently. Then I spent the next month doing the same. And the next and the next. Speaking up in my new field felt like trying to jump into a double-dutch rope, and there I was stuck knees bent, swaying to the rhythm of the ropes on the sidelines.Sure, I have a writing and rhetoric degree, taught writing to middle school students and have a portfolio of my writing online. But sometimes, I felt like an AP student with straight As rendered obsolete when I struggled to u nderstand editorial vocabulary, data terms and success metrics. I didnt share many ideas or question much of anything. I just waited to be told what to do because I knew I could do that well.When my performance review rolled around, my manager popped my debilitating bubble of illusion with this simple statementYoure very engaged with the team (both the editorial team and Fairygodboss as a whole).Her perspective made me aware that Id put myself under an imaginary pressure somewhere along the line. That at some point, I started treating myself less warmly, saw myself with less authority and stopped giving myself the credit I deserved for being present. But my managers comment was an important one it let me know that what I was doing was enough.With that, I learned it doesnt matter how long it took me to learn how to swim in this new field. (Ive only been in it for six months, for goodness sake). My treading water looks like doggy paddling so thats all that matters so long as I work on my full strokes which I am.2. Im an advocate for unrepresented people and populations. In completing my own self-evaluation, I noticed a recurring theme in my writing diversity and inclusion. Every other article Ive written has been about Latinx women, the LGBTQ+ community or women in leadership.And looking back, Ive happily jumped at any opportunity to write about these topics or forged those opportunities myself (like the time I covered Bernadette Sheridans panel, a colleague who shared advice on how to stay competitive as a woman over 50 in todays digital work world).Ironically enough, I noticed this theme when I listed out the critical accomplishments section of my evaluation. The contributions I felt the most proud of were the ones that exercised my advocacy (and in many respects, my identity, too). Heres an excerpt of my reflectionLGBTQ+ contentI wrote comprehensive LGBTQ+ content in June and found high-volume KWs for production that month. This effort showed our awareness of gender diversity and identity and demonstrated our solidarity with the community.National Hispanic Heritage Month I edited the National Hispanic Heritage Month article to accurately reflect and recognize the Latinx community, and changed the tone from passive to active. This achievement positioned us as informed allies and activists on the state of immigration and Latinx-facing issues in our country.Before my self-evaluation, the only proof of my allyship to underrepresented groups was my Facebook page where I reposted social justice content on an inconsistent basis. Now, I had proof that I cared. And, to combat my imposter syndrome (because why not?), I had proof that my buttin this seat mattered.All-in-all, performance review season can be a scary time (which it totenstill was for me, just to be clear). But its also a time to reflect honestly about who you are, why youre in your role and if your role is truly the right fit for you.If you want to ease your pre-review jitters, t hen request 90-day performance reviews with your manager or schedule weekly meetings to discuss whats going well, where you could use more support and how you can get ahead of your workload. I had both with my manager before my bi-annual review and its probably why my discoveries were more pleasant than not.--Stephanie Nieves is the SEO Editorial Associate on the Fairygodboss team. Her words can also be found on Medium,PayScaleand The Muse.